Catching up on what's been going on...
I'm up about 4-5 pounds this week. Not a huge surprise seeing all the sodium I've been taking in. I did end up having way too much on Easter. I felt gluttonous but at the same time I think it was "good" for me to remember how terrible I feel after gorging on bad food. Now it's time to move on.
I had a great, lengthy chat with my therapist yesterday. A huge lightbulb went off in my head after we came to come realizations about why I hate preparing and cooking good food. We were talking about the foods that I like and the foods I don't. The list of likes is much shorter as well as more calorie dense than the foods I do like.
We realized that I seem to have a sensory issue going on. It's mostly an oral one, but because we have to eat to live, it's also an important one to figure out and probably has a lot to do with my weight and food issues.
What do I mean about sensory issues? Well, let me give you some examples of foods that I can't/won't eat...
Chicken: I will eat chicken but there are a lot of conditions that go along with it. If it's over-cooked, no way. If it tastes like chicken, not gonna happen. If there is a piece of fat that makes it's way in undetected, you can bet I'm not finishing it. It mostly comes down to texture with a little bit of taste issues.
Pork: Another one that's not-gonna-happen. I don't like the way it feels on my teeth.
Mushrooms: Oh boy! This one sends me in a tailspin. I can't handle the "bite" to them followed by the bit of "squishiness"
I could go on and on here. The point is that we really realized that I get burned out so easily because there isn't much that I can handle. I tend to stick to the kinds of foods that disguise the goodness....sauces and gravies come to mind.
I know it all sounds so crazy, but I think I've really hit upon something with this. My therapist is doing some research, as am I. We'll figure this out. Until then, I will just keep on keeping on the best way I know how.
Hi Jenn! Well, most of the time, I don't eat food for pleasurable purposes. It's not exactly that I hate my food, but I don't get excited about it either. If a person likes their food too much, then they want to eat too much. Mostly, I eat things like scrambled eggs, hard boiled eggs, tuna, oatmeal, oranges--things that I'm not likely to overeat. *None* of these foods are on my OMG food list. I used to be 60 pounds heavier when I ate mostly off my "I enjoy this food" list. So the choice was made.
ReplyDelete:-) Marion