Anniversary Weekend

Sending a shout out to Hubs this weekend...HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!  We've been married for 11 years as of yesterday. It's amazing how fast the time has gone by...I still remember our wedding like it was yesterday.

Eating this weekend has been just OK. Friday I probably could have done better at dinner and yesterday I should have had more protein in the morning because by mid afternoon I was ravenous. We ended up eating out which is never good for the wallet or the waistline. I opted for the terrible choices because I was so hungry.  I hate it when I don't plan ahead.

Today could go either way.  We're headed to Gillette Stadium for the Pats game. I haven't been to a game since the playoffs from the first time we went to the superbowl with the Giants. Needless to say I am pretty excited! The food choices there aren't the best...clearly. It's a football stadium for goodness sakes. It's full of nachos and beer!  Good thing I hate beer.

I am super excited to have a day off. No kids. I LOVE my kids more than anything in the world! I hug them and squeeze them a million times a day. I tell them a billion times a day how much I love them. But I need a break. I'm really looking forward to some much needed adult only time. The only thing I'm not looking forward to is the state of my house when we return tonight. My brother is "watching" the kids. Actually, my brother will be watching the football games with his friend while my niece and two boys run amok through the house. It's all good though. I get to go out. Sans kids.

Friday beating

I'm starting to love my Friday beatings. 

I swear the trainers are worse on Friday's than any other day during the week!  

Today I got to work out with Rudy. When I walked in and was all settled, he came over to get started. I looked at him and said "oh, are you ready for me?" He nodded. I then said "Well, I'm not so sure I'm ready for you!"  We both giggled and got on with it. 

Today was another "first" for me. Rudy thought it would be a good idea to try something similar to this: 

It wasn't as pretty as that though. I guarantee it. I hate getting into the plank position to begin with. I'm always afraid I'm going to collapse (never have, so I should get over it already). I didn't tap my shoulder though. I was supposed to tap my hands but I didn't really have the strength to get "that far" so Rudy held his hand right next to mine so I just had to hold my body up on one arm long enough to tap his hand. I (just barely) was able to complete 10 reps on each side. Oye!  That was rough, but I did it!

The scale was stable this week. No loss. No gain. I'd like to lose 5 pounds by November 1st. If I get back to walking on the treadmill on my "off" days and eating better, I think I can do it! Here goes nothing. 

Feel the burn

I hate it when my sleep is interrupted, especially when it's because my chest is on fire with heartburn. Oh, I've been suffering with some major heartburn the last few days. I've even put myself back on some Prilosec. Ugh. I hate taking medications!  It's all my own fault though. All week I've been eating more processed foods than I have in a while. It's really starting to get to me. I was so uncomfortable last night that I hardly ate today out of fear of pain.

Better Day

Today was remarkably better than the last few days.

My spirits were lifted a bit after completing yet another awesome workout with Damon!
I was especially excited because I was able to do one of these:

The first time I tried one of those (day one of working with Damon), I went into complete panic mode. I ended up having to raise one leg at a time while the other stayed on the floor.  Today was another story. I'm sure it didn't look pretty, but I was able to complete the exercise as it was meant to be!  Go me! 

It's moments like that that make me realize how strong I am becoming and how far I've come. The scale may be moving at a snail's pace (this week is 150% my fault) but in the end the workouts are working. 

I also dug deep and decided that I can't be all down in the dumps like this for a week at a time on a monthly basis. I need to buck up and do what I can to snap out of it. And that is exactly what I did. I started by getting the chores done: they certainly aren't going to get done by themselves. Then I went on and organized a little section of my kitchen counter that was starting to look like a massive mountain of paperwork and junk. I still have some other organizing project to get done, but for the most part things are in order and I can stop stressing out about the small stuff. 

The small stuff. That's what seems to bother me the most during my PMS/PMDD days. It is so frustrating to feel this way. Imagine being totally stressed out because you have to sweep the floor (I know, the horror!). But that's exactly what life is like for me during these times; the smallest of tasks can feel like having to climb the highest of mountains. On days like today when I can tell that voice to shush, I feel so much better. It's days like today that I need to bear in mind when I'm having such a horrible day where even getting out of bed in the morning is too much.  Depressing? Yes. But it's the truth...once I'm back to day one of my cycle, I am back to being me.  I CAN'T wait for day one! 

Where's that wagon gone now?

Ugh!  I need to get back on that lousy wagon! I'm really seeing a pattern here; I do well for 3 weeks out of the month and then really lose it (and my mind) for one. That is certainly me this week. I'm in the blah zone today.  My eldest was home sick from school both yesterday and today. Yesterday, I was motivated to at least get some housework done along with some organizing in my craft room. Today was a completely different story. I was mopey, hung around on the intertubes for most of the morning and snuck in a nap this afternoon.  My house is a disaster and I have nothing left in me to take care of it. I wish there was an anti-depressant that I could take during the week prior to TOM. I guess there is...exercise.

Oh, did I mention I haven't done any of that either!  Oh my! My last workout was on Friday. I didn't get to the gym yesterday because my son had a fever and a sore throat so we were at the DR's office. No Strep (yea!  We get to hold on to the "never had that in our house" medal). I was planning on getting up this morning to walk on the treadmill and then I was going to do the same tonight. Nope. I did nothing. I really should have stuffed my bad voice down into the depths of you-know-where and hopped on the treadmill, but I didn't. Frustrated with myself for that decision!

Tomorrow is Wednesday, gym day!  Can't wait!  The big kid's fever broke late this morning, so he'll be cleared for school tomorrow. My little man was hitting 99.8 this afternoon, but no fever as of bedtime, so God-willing, I'll be at the gym in the morning!  And I need it!

And the tone here isn't like the whiney crap of yester-month. It's more of an annoyance with myself for letting my mood dictate what I'm going to do. Tomorrow will be a new day and I will get on that wagon...

....I just hope the wagon didn't roll away with the Earthquake we had tonight. WHAT?  Earthquake!?  Surely not here in New England!  Yup, was a 4.6 in Maine and felt down through Connecticut. My kids were freaked out, but everyone is OK. It was something new for us in these parts. Nothing like a  little jolt to make you feel alive.

Just have it already

I've been craving an ice cream sundae. I've dodged the craving but have been eating everything else instead. I'm soon to see TOM (sorry for the TMI, but it's all part of the journey) and this is how I get. I learned once that I should just go ahead and have whatever-it-is that I'm longing for so I don't go looking for replacements.  That's ultimately what I've been doing the last 3 days and I know I'm going to pay for it. So, tonight I am having an ice cream sundae so I can get on with it.

Weekend Update

I have a love/hate relationship with busy days. I love when time just moves right along and yet I hate it when I'm so busy that I get consumed by outside things and plans don't fall into place like they are supposed to. This was me Friday.

I was up early (for me). Out the door by 7:30 to get to an appointment at the hospital in Boston for 10.  The trip in to the city took "only" 90 minutes, (with no traffic it takes me about 30 or a bit less depending on where in the city I'm headed). Anyway, I had an appointment to see the rheumatologist about the psoriasis and possibly having psoriatic arthritis. I love this doctor that I see. He is very thorough and listens to what you have to say. He never makes me feel like I'm crazy or just imagining the things I feel.

He's not all that sure what is going on with me. He said it's quite possible I have psoriatic arthritis and at this point, it would be very mild. He took X-rays of my hands to see what's going on there. He's also running the Lupus test again. Do you know how many times I've been tested for Lupus? More than I can count!  There was this one time where the one test came back positive, but it's been negative ever since. I go back in 8 weeks to follow up with how I'm feeling.

After my appointment, I headed off to the gym. I was exhausted when I walked in and exhilarated by the time I walked out. Bob (trainer for the day) noticed how tired I was but was relieved to see how quickly I woke up. He gave me one heck of a workout!

My one regret is that I didn't let the workout carry me through the weekend. I have to admit to not eating so great this weekend. Yesterday wasn't too bad but today was just awful!  I am in no way beating myself up about it because that isn't going to be productive. I'm going to admit to my 3 pieces of pizza (very abnormal for me) and then had Mexican for dinner (I overate for sure!). Like I said though, I am owning it and am moving on.

The plan for the week is to have my 3 training sessions (30 mins. each) and then I will do 8 minutes on the arc trainer (been working my way up to 10) along with 15 on the bike (again, working my way up). I will also commit to walking on the treadmill on both Tuesday and Thursday (off from the gym  those 2 days). All of that with some water and juicing.

Oh yea, juicing. I'll talk about that this week...should be a fun journey.