Thursday, December 20, 2012

Just saying hi

Sorry I've been away this month. December has a way of getting away from me!
Someone gave me a little nudge this morning though and reminded me I should post (thanks!).

Nothing much is doing by way of weight loss. Kind of just hanging in there for now. I've had a "mini flu" as I've been calling it. Missed a week of the gym but am getting back into the routine this week. It's been slow going but at least I'm there!

Anyway, I promise to get back into writing and being here more often next week. I just get pulled in so many directions during the month of December that the "little things" get neglected. :(

I wish you and yours a very happy holiday season and I will check in with you next week.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012


I totally didn't want to go to the gym today. I was in a sour mood and feeling stressed about some stuff that's going on behind the scenes.  The good thing about having a set appointment with a trainer is that I can't just not got. He's there waiting for me so I have to buck up and go.

I walked into the gym with a smile on my face. Talking myself into working out and realizing that a great workout will help ease some of the frustrations I am feeling with another situation. I worked hard today. I didn't take as many breather breaks in between each set. There was a lot of talking going on in my head. Had to let myself know that I wasn't going to run out of breath. My breathing was a bit labored at times but I was still getting oxygen and wasn't going to die.

While working so hard, Damon pulls out the red kettle bell. I was thinking "Whoa!  What's up with the red...I'm just getting used to the green". He saw the wheels turning and said something about how I need to remember how on the first day I could hardly hold the little yellow one. The red is just another stepping stone to get to the ultimate one: blue. YIKES!

So, for my last exercise for the day I got to put on the gloves:
This is no Damon was putting the gloves, what comes on the radio?  Yep!  You guessed it!  A little Eye of The Tiger!  We both laughed, then I punched him. HAHA!

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Holy Workout, Batman!

I can hardly move today.  Damon really worked me out yesterday. I haven't been this sore after a work out in a long time. I had a hard time reaching my arms up to wash my hair this morning.  Reminded me of a story Mark from The Biggest Loser season 5 told us at the taping of season 10 in Boston. He said that after working out with Bob and Jillian: even the simplest of things like showering were rough joking that he'd just put a little shampoo on his head and rub his head on the shower wall because he couldn't move his arms. 
Mark Kruger

That's pretty much how I felt this morning. My arms are in a world of hurt but it's a welcomed feeling! It helps to feel a bit of that muscle ache to remind me to put the cupcake (or whatever) down and reach for an apple instead. Certainly don't want to work that hard only to throw it all out the window for a moment on the lips. 

Monday, December 3, 2012

December Goals

Oh December! Oh Monday!

I love the month of December. It's full of festivities and celebrations. It's also very, very busy. I feel like December is full before it even starts. It never ceases to amaze me how you can go from having virtually nothing to do to being straight out for days and/or weeks at a time.

My postings will continue to be spotty throughout the month. It's not that I don't want to make the time to check in, checking in certainly does help me stay on track. It's just that I'm being pulled in a million directions right now. So, please forgive me if I go quiet for a bit.

Anyway, what's going on with my progress?  Well, I'm still up the 9 pounds and have added another 3. I honestly don't know what is going on. I know my eating hasn't been 100% on target, but I'm not eating over my calorie budget on a daily basis. There is no way I should be up nearly 12 pounds. Ugh. Damon (Monday and Wednesday trainer) says it's probably from all the salty foods from Thanksgiving. Rudy (my Friday trainer) approached me today to see how much I was down. He said he's really noticing a big change in my figure. I laughed and told him I am up nearly 12 pounds. He was speechless.

I have a physical in a few weeks. I'm most certainly going to discuss this with my doctor when I see her. I understand that our bodies can fluctuate from day-to-day but swinging 10+ pounds is getting to be very discouraging.

That all being said, I'm setting some goals for this December:
1. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.  I am terrible with getting my water in during the colder months.  I do, however, find it much easier to drink water when I have my huge water bottle full and at the ready. 

2. Not going to sweat the small stuff. I'm hoping to just continue the coarse and will be happy to maintain this month but would be even more happy with a 5 pound loss; the 12 that I have gained along with another 5...I know the 12 is probably water so the hydration should help with that.

3. Be on during the week. Be careful and mindful on the weekends. With all the Christmas parties coming up, it's going to be difficult to stay on plan for the weekend. I will have plans for each situation and will do my best to not go overboard. I will be 100% honest with myself and you about what goes on over the weekends. (I always am, just putting it out there). 

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Back to Work

Today I'm going back to work. I'm not sure if I mentioned this last week or not but I received a call from the woman I interviewed with about a month ago. At the time, she said she wanted someone with more Excel experience. She called me out of the blue last week to offer me the position. Apparently the woman she hired didn't work out so well. I'm curious what went so wrong. How can someone quit/be fired in less than a month?  I guess it's no matter, I get to have a go at a much-needed parttime job.

My eldest isn't too happy with my going back to work. Mind you, I'm only working two nights a week; a total of 7-8 hours...just enough to fill a gas tank (HA!). I've broached the subject of my looking for work a number of times in the past, he never liked the idea. Now that it's here? He hates it. I explained to him that it's only two nights a week and I will see him everyday before he gets on the bus. I won't get to tuck him in but I will (as I always do) kiss him and his brother when I get home.

I'm going to have to buckle down and meal plan a bit better. As it is, three days a week are spent on the pool deck while my eldest swims for the swim team. Those afternoons are nothing short of hectic. Adding in my work schedule is going to get dicey.  And yes, I realize people work and manage a household all at the same time. It's going to be an adjustment but one that I can handle.

As far as the weight stuff goes, I hopped on the scale this morning (a day early) because I was feeling light and my skin looked so healthy (I'm told I have "nice skin" all the time, but I'd beg to differ). Well, I shouldn't have looked! I'm up 9 pounds. I guess I best get to drinking some water today. I am very dehydrated. I know it's *mostly* water weight because I certainly didn't eat an extra 31000 calories last week!  I probably had an extra 3, maybe 4 thousand over the weekend (that would be a pound or so)....not 9!  I'm not going to stress out about it. I know what I need to do to get the scale back on track.

Off to hydrate, hydrate, hydrate!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Mid-week catch up

This weekend sure got away from me!
I hope you had a great Thanksgiving and are recovering from your food coma.  I know I am. It's back to the grind for sure today!

I've been running around too much this last week or so. Too much to do, too little time. Hopefully I can come up for some air soon. Until then though, I'll play along with Kenlie's FMM: Dear Santa

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here at: so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!
Dear Santa:  List at least ten things that you may or may not need that you’d love to find under your tree this year!   

I'll preface my answers with we don't exchange gifts for the adults in my house. The gifts are strictly for the kids. Maybe someday, when we are independently wealthy, that will change. Until then, it's all for the kids. BUT, if Santa should happen to let a few things fall off his sleigh, these things I wouldn't mind taking off his hands:
1. A laptop. I would love a MacBook but will take just about anything. My computer in my scraproom is dying. I just "need" something that I can troll the intertubes and run my scrapping software on. Nothing fancy. 
2. Gift cards to online scrappy stores. I've had to cut back on my scrappy goodness buying so I could put those to good use! 
3. Time. Wouldn't it be nice to have a few extra moments during the day to sit back and take it all in. I hate how fast time goes by! 
4. Patience. Oh how I could use a little patience sometimes! 

5. Attention Span. I seriously think I have adult ADD.  I started this post on Monday. It's now Wednesday!  YIKES! 

That's all I can think of. I don't really need or want anything. I have the best family a gal could ever ask for and that is all I really need. 

OK. Sorry I've been so spastic with my writing. The holiday season tends to get me off of track. There are always 100 million things to get done and hardly enough time in the day. Amazing how you can go from having nothing to do to having too much to do!  It will all get done and I need to learn to stop to smell the roses a bit along the way. 

My workouts are getting rough. Damon had me try a few new-to-me exercises today. I rocked them and will probably feel it tomorrow but that's OK. If Damon is turning up the heat though, I'm very afraid of what Friday will look like when I train with Rudy. Someone hold me. 

I'm getting better and back on track with the eating. I've resorted to stocking up on daily lunches of the frozen variety.  I've done that because I need a little stability and something easy to follow right now. I think having the connivence foods is going to help me stay as close to on track as I can be for now. Trust me, I don't like eating nuke-a-meals on a daily basis, but I honestly feel it's going to be a big help with getting through the holidays. Once things calm down, I will go back to prepping and planning. 

Friday, November 23, 2012

Holiday Week

I don't know about you, but this week has just gotten away from me! 

Did you go out shopping today? I went out last night. Stood inline at Toys R Us for a few hours with my friend. We had a great time! I think I bought out the store. The kids should be happy!  I also popped into Michaels and grabbed some fun crafty stuff among other things. My friend also wanted to hop over to Wal-Mart (if you know me, I don't "do" Wal-Mart)...anyway, we're driving down the road and see that the parking lot is total mayhem. I pulled in thinking we'd be pulling right back out. We did manage to find a spot though and ventured on in to find the item she was looking for. Only had to stand in line for 30 minutes or so to check out. It was worth the comedic and entertainment value to watch people go nuts over crap just because it was on sale. Oh, so much fun! 

As far a the food goes, things went really well yesterday!  I didn't go too far off the deep end. Today? That's another story. I can't believe all the garbage I ate today. Wasn't supposed to be that way, we were supposed to take the kids someplace today but we were all wiped out. At least I'll be in the gym in the morning!  Working with a new-to-me trainer. Should be fun. 

Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! 

Monday, November 19, 2012

Monday, Monday

I cannot believe that it's Thanksgiving week already!  Doesn't seem possible. Alas, we are here. I have a million-and-one things I need to get done before Wednesday and then Wednesday will be straight out with baking. 

I'm also feeling a little sad that we are entering this week...we were supposed to be leaving for Disney on Wednesday afternoon but I had to cancel that trip. I'm a bit depressed about it but am working on a budget so we can go sometime next year for sure. 

Time to play along with Kenlie's FMM: Thanksgiving Edition

1. Do you have any Thanksgiving traditions?  If so, please share them.  The tradition is that I host. I DO NOT cook Turkey though - I hate turkey!  My mother will cook it in her oven on her side of the house and I'll do the rest....although hubs says he's doing it this year because I hate Thanksgiving. (Well, I love the premise of it, I just hate all the prep and the cleaning and the cooking and the cleaning again). 
2. List at least three dishes that are on your family’s table every year. We're pretty basic...mashed potatoes, stuffing, fresh bread 
3. Do you prefer pumpkin pie or pecan pie?  Pumpkin!!
4. Will you watch football on Thanksgiving Day? I would love to this year because my Pats are playing but I will be doing a bad thing...I'll be inline at Toys R Us.  I live in a state (only 2 left in the nation ) that has blue laws so I'll be popping over the border to NH to stand in line with other black Friday freaks.  Now, don't hate on me. I don't agree that the stores should be open on Thanksgiving but I would never, ever get up at an unruly hour to go stand, I'll go at night. But, if there was a petition to stop all that nonsense, I would sign it. I'm just going to participate while I can because I can. 
5. Do you plan to exercise Thursday?  I’m hoping to. Hubs, make me get on the treadmill, would ya?
6. Do you prefer ham or turkey?  HAM!  I HATE Turkey!  (Hey, haters gonna hate)
7. Will you shop on Black Friday?  Thursday night - TRU and Walmart but only because my friend wants to go there. My feelings about Walmart are right up there with my feelings about turkey. 
8. Do you take a nap on Thanksgiving? I wish!  I will be sleeping a lot of Friday though! :) 
9. Share one dish that probably won’t be on anyone else’s table. Well, if I decide to make potroast....other than that, we are pretty standard people over here. 
10. What are you thankful for today?  I'm thankful to have a warm house to live in and food on the table. Times are rough out there. 

Friday, November 16, 2012

Weigh in

Down 8 pounds this week (5 was the water weight I gained last week)
Total is 18.9
Just 10 pounds left before I hit my first important milestone....and 15 from where I was last Christmas. I would love to lose 15 between now and Christmas but I won't hold my breath. I know how slow I lose so I will be happy with whatever I can get!

Had a great workout today with Rudy!  He really pushed me and I realized that I am a lot stronger than I think. Love how the brain takes a while to catch up to the body. That's not so say I won't be back in doubt on Monday though. HA!

Sorry, but that's all I have energy for today. My kids had us up before the crack of dawn today. I'm wiped out!

Thursday, November 15, 2012


I can't believe it's been well over a week since I've last checked in!

Here's the scoop:

  • Weight loss is at a stand still...well, that's not entirely true. The scale did move last the wrong direction!  I was up about 5 pounds. I checked this morning and most of those 5 pounds are gone! Yeah! 
  • Workouts at the gym are great!  I usually want to cry, so I know they are working! :)
  • I need to work on getting the workouts done on my "off days" - too many excuses! 
  • I met with my "paid friend" (as my real friend so eloquently puts it) this week. We discussed how I'm having a hard time getting the daily stuff done. Not in a depressed, I don't wanna do it sort of's hard to explain but through a bit of chatter, I figured out that I'm bored. My kids are getting older now, it may be time to look (seriously) for some work. 

So, that's it from here. I will get back to the regularly scheduled program very soon, I promise!  And to all who's blogs I frequent regularly, I'm sorry I haven't been around to support you (you know who you are). Know that you are in my thoughts and I will catch up soon! 

Now, time for some shut-eye. 

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Election Day

Good morning!
I'm writing this post at 4:30 am. it's unprecedented for me to be up at this hour. I'm on my way into Boston to stand up for what I believe in. I'm being a part of history today and for that I'm proud. I've been called a lot of names as of late and am tired of it. I hate how one sided people can be.

No matter your political beliefs, I hope you'll do your duty as an American and will go vote!

And please remember that we are all American's first. It doesn't matter if you are a Democrat, Republican or other party. In the end we are all on the same  side and want we feel is best for our country.

So, for today, my only exercise will be a fight; a fight for what I believe in.

Go vote! And be nice to one another!

Monday, November 5, 2012

Monday, Monday and FMM

Is it really Monday already?  Monday's are so busy around here. I guess it's a good thing, keeps me out of trouble. I'm getting ready to leave the house to hit the gym. I'm looking forward to my workout with Damon today!

I'm keeping it simple today and am just going to play along with Kenlie's FMM: 10 reasons to be thankful...

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here at: so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Ten Reasons To Be Thankful
1. I have a wonderful family. I love my hubs and kids more than anything in the world and without them, I would be nothing. 
2. I also have wonderful and supportive extended family (hey Cuz and Brother-in-law whom I know read my blog!). Without family support in whatever we do, it would make the road that much more rough. 
3. I'm blessed to be able to participate in something that I feel strongly about on election day. I'm not getting into it because I have been beaten up enough about my political views and I'd like to be civil because I believe in civility. 
4. I have terrific friends. 
5. I'm thankful for Damon (my trainer) who fought for me to get into the gym (being able to afford it)
6. We were saved from Sandy. I pray every day for the people who were affected and hope they have some relief sooner rather than later. 
7. I'm thankful and grateful to all who come to read what I'm talking about. And am especially thankful to those who stick around and banter with me. I appreciate your time. 
8. I'm able (just barely sometimes) to stay home with my kids and watch them grow. 
9. To live in a country where I am free to speak my mind. 
10. I'm also thankful to be finding my way back to God. It's all through my son as he's getting ready to celebrate his first communion, I've been relearning the prayers with him. I won't get all religious on you, it's just a great feeling. 
Will you play along with Kenlie?  I'd love to see your answers! 

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Liebster Award

I woke up yesterday thinking about my weekend post. It was going to be about how mean people suck. I had a "mean" encounter last week (it was online and about politics, when will I learn) and I really wanted to talk about how words can really hurt. I had the post all planned out in my head and logged on to begin writing when I saw that I had a comment on my last post from J.D. over at J.D. Notified me that he was nominating me for the Liebster Award. 


Something nice just happened. 

My mood and thought process just changed all because of one person's thoughtfulness. 

So, now what?  Well, first I have to thank J.D for nominating me. Second, I have to find out just what the Liebster Award is.

I Googled "Liebtser Award" as well as other variations like "Liebster Blog Award" and things of the like. It seems the award is given to bloggers who have less than 200 followers. Some say it's like a chain letter...and I suppose that in a way, it is. Unlike a chain letter though, I am going to play along with this one. What better way to recognize "the little people". 

One of the other things I've noticed in my travels is that everyone is playing by similar, yet slightly different rules. Because J.D. paid it forward to me, I will go forth with the rules he stated on his blog. 

The Rules:
1. State 11 personal facts. (Yikes!)
2. Answer the questions from the person who nominated you. 
3. Nominate 5 bloggers who have less than 200 followers (no tag backs) and ask them random questions.
4. Complete your post.
5. Link up your post on the originating bloggers post. 

Just the Facts:
  1. I'm finding this part to be extremely difficult because I am an open book. I guess fact one should be: I am an open book. I find it therapeutic to not bottle stuff up and keep it to myself. 
  2. I'm not very creative when it comes to naming my pets. I once had a guinea pig named "Pigus" and a cat named "Kitty". Ok, Kitty wasn't her real name, it was originally Mineu (mee-noo) because that's what my grandmother called every cat she saw (she wasn't French, my grandfather was- go figure). 
  3. I take things too personally. I will let things eat at me and eat at me. I have a really hard time letting go of the negative and focusing on the positive. 
  4. I dream about going to Disney on a daily basis. 
  5. Wishes I established more of a career for myself to go back to when my kids are older. I worry about getting back into the work force. 
  6. I've always wanted a large family. If I could, I would have 6 kids. Hubs would like only 2 but has agreed to have a third. Now that my youngest is almost 4, I'm not sure I want to have that third child. I know I will never regret having another but I know I will always wonder what life would be like with a third. 
  7. Speaking of kids. I always wanted to have just boys. And I have 2 beautiful boys. Lately though I've been tearing up when I see girly things and think I may want to try for that girl (but would love another boy). I think I just heard hubs run for the hills -haha!
  8. Hates Thanksgiving. Really. I do.  No joke. I like the premis of it, but I hate the actual day. We have a small family and I feel like it's a whole heck of a lot of work for a whole lot of nothing. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with the family.  I really do. Again, it's just a lot of work for a big meal for a small family. 
  9. Would love to start a home cake business. I love making cakes. 
  10. I act as if I'm outgoing, but in reality I'm afraid of my shadow. 
  11. I feel like I live a less-than-ordinary life. Don't get me wrong, I like my life, I just wish (sometimes) that it was more "eventful". Then again, when things turn "eventful", it's usually of the drama variety and that I can do without. 
J.D.'s Questions to me:
1. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
That one is easy; 26! I loved being in my 20's. Especially my mid to late 20's when I met my husband. I felt like I was just beginning my life. I loved it. 

2. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
Hrm...Well, I would probably not put off til tomorrow. Seriously, I am a procrastinator by nature. I always feel like there is plenty of time and get frustrated when time is up. 

3. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
Well, I always tell my kids to be themselves. Never let anyone try to change them or make them feel less than a person for who they are. 

4. If you had a personal motto, what would it be?
Yikes!  That's a tough one. I would have to say "Hakuna Matata" Which is a little odd because I do worry a lot but I know in the end that everything will work it self out. 

5. What was your favorite Christmas gift between the ages 5 and 17?  What makes it so special?
It was a swatch watch that my grandmother gave me. It looked close to the one pictured above. It was special because she was special to me. She passed when I was 13 years old. She adored me. She spoiled me. I wanted a swatch watch more than anything else on that particular Christmas and she got one for me. I believe it was her last Christmas with us. I still have a little piece of that watch hidden away in a safe place. 

6. What would you differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
I would dance. Seriously. I used to love going dancing but I was always the subject of some cruel joke so I stopped going. 

7. What is your least favorite quote?
It's not so much a quote but I hate it when people say "you people". Gets my blood going every time and yet I've found myself saying it a few times. Yikes!

8. What day of the week do you hate the most and why?
This is a tough one. I would probably say end of the day Sunday because it's almost Monday. Hubs goes back to work, the kids get back into school, and the week takes off. Monday's are busy around here...I don't hate Monday's, I just hate that Monday is coming. 

9. If you could choose your "last meal" what would it be and why?
Hmmmm....I guess it would depend on my mood. If I'm looking for comfort food, I would have to say Macaroni and Cheese from a local restaurant that makes the best mac & cheese I've ever had! If I was looking for a meal though, I would have to say prime rib served on the rare side with mashed potatoes and sautéed green beans.   

10. (Here's a hard one) If you could only save one person besides yourself, who would it be?
Wow. This is a tough one. And it brings a tear to my eye. I would obviously save my kids but to have to choose, I don't think I would be able to. I guess the only way out would be to save my husband so he could save both kids. :D 

11. How many pets have you had in your lifetime?  Names and descriptions please. 
I've had too many. Mostly cats and dogs but I've had a few guinea pigs and fish as well. 
My current cats are Sabrina and Boo. We rescued them from a shelter. Sabrina is a long haired tabby and Boo is a short haired black cat. Sabrina chose me and hubs chose Boo. Seriously. When we went to the shelter, there were a number of cats roaming around the room on their own while others where in cages. While I was searching the room, this one cat kept following me around and she'd tap me on the back while I was playing with other cats. I realized that she really wanted to come home with us, so the rest is history with her.  Hubs chose the other cat. Not sure why. He's not a fan of cats, or animals in general, but he felt the cat shouldn't be we got two. 
We also had another cat named Rachel. She was a long-haired black cat. I "surprised" my hubs with her. Again, he's not a fan of animals and I can't live without them. Rachel sadly died rather suddenly. We aren't sure if she had a heart attack or something like that or if our dog Drew sat on her until she stopped breathing.
Oh, Drew. He was a crazy dog!  He would tear apart the house while we were away. He was very high maintenance so we found him a new home that could handle him. He's living with a friend of my mother's and we couldn't be happier that he's a happy boy with his new family. 

Questions for my nominees (I am changing this one to 5 questions)
1. If you were president for a day, what would you do/change and why? (sorry, the political stuff is on my mind...I wonder why? ;-))
2. Who do you admire the most?  And why? Can be someone living or deceased, real or imaginary. 
3. What is your favorite holiday? How do you celebrate that holiday?
4. What are you most afraid of?
5. If you could choose a new profession, what would you do?

And my nominees:
Unfortunately, most of the blogs I read are ones that are fairly established. There is no rhyme or reason for it, other than maybe I am lazy and only have the attention span to read a few blogs a day. That all being said, I will work on finding a few new blogs to read this week.
SO, if either of you decide to participate, please pay it forward to someone else for me and I am going to work on finding another blog or two to add to my blog roll. :D 

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Oh Sandy

Sorry I haven't posted but know that we are OK.

Sandy came to visit us here in the Boston area late on Monday afternoon. She brought with her some rain and winds which knocked out power (ours was out for 29 hours, some in town are still out as of this writing). Shamefully, I was complaining a lot about the lack of power. The kids were at each other's throats and I was losing my patience. Once the power came back on and I saw the devastation on the news, I would have gladly given up my power to give some of these people their homes back!

So, to start November off, I'm thankful that we came out of Sandy relatively unscathed.

Sandy has left me with poor eating habits and no trips to the gym thus far this week. I WILL be going tomorrow and can't wait to get back into better habits.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Weekend Wrap Up

I can't believe it's the end of the weekend already! But is it? Turns out school is out tomorrow. Hurricane Sandy is making her debut here in New England sometime tomorrow. The state has called off all schools tomorrow. Fun times.

I've prepared the house for a power outage. We have a small generator that will run the fridge, heat and one small electronic item (laptop). The DS's, iPad, and iPhone are all charging, the car is gassed up (incase we need to hunker down in the car to watch DVD's), all other electronics and flashlights have fresh batteries. Bring it on Sandy!  We are ready!

That's all I have for now. My mind is racing with all the things I would like to get done before any power outage. If you're in the north east, stay safe.

Friday, October 26, 2012

It's beating time

Good morning!

Gotta love Friday's. HA!  I'm gearing up for my beating with Rudy today. I am so tired this morning too. Should be interesting! I'll let you know how it goes later on in the post.

Last night we went to a Halloween party that my husband's company puts on for their families. It's always a good time. The kids get to trick-or-treat at the different activities they have set up, they serve a little dinner and have some sort of a show. This year's show was a "Mad Scientist". I felt rather bad for the guy because the audience thinned out rather quickly. I think it was a little too much for the smaller kids (which represents a large portion of the kids there).

Anyway, the party was a good time. My little guy loved wearing his newly-finished Jake costume.
As far as the food goes, I did splurge and had a piece of pizza (so not worth it) and had a rice krispies treat. I also "stole" 2 pieces of little chocolates from the kid's bags. (Shhhh....don't tell 'em!)
BUT, I did come home to hop on the treadmill. I was exhausted and bloated but I did it anyway.  I just turned on the tube and kept myself at a nice slow pace so I wouldn't cramp (I fought cramps the whole time). Walking at 2.0, incline of 2 for 50 minutes felt pretty darn good. It certainly would have been a faster workout if I had walked at my typical 3 for 30 but that's OK. I did what I could do and was happy that I got something done. Small victories people, small victories. 

Today is weigh in day. How did I do?  Well, I was 5 pounds down. I was excited but thought about how it was highly unlikely I could be *that* much down so I hopped on again just to be sure. Yes, now I'm just about the same. What? I try again after pulling the battery I'm up 4 pounds. Guess I'm stopping for a new battery on my way to the gym. 

And speaking of the gym, I best get going. Hold me. I'm so flipping tired!  This is going to be rough. I won't post until I get back though. Will be interesting to see what tune I'm singing when it's all over. Wish me luck. 

OMG!  It's a miracle I'm still alive. Seriously. I think Rudy was trying to kill me today. I arrived to the gym a little early so I fit in 14 minutes on the arc trainer, then had a beating. The first exercise was and easy one, but it was all downhill from there!  The second exercise he had me on the balance ball. Well, my hands were on the ball, the ball was against the wall, and the rest of me was in a pushup position on the ball. I had to walk my feet out (left to right and right to left) while staying in the pushup position. So, when Rudy showed me what I was supposed to do I burst out laughing and said "Gee! Nothing like throwing me to the wolves this morning" He siad "well, if I let you warm up first, our time would be over". I suppose he had a point. 

One of Rudy's favorite sayings is "hate me now, love me later". If that ain't the truth!  I am always like Gumby and half the time I'm fighting my inner "you can't do this" voice...but when I'm done, I feel like I can take on the world; after a nap, of course!  HA! 

I finished up my workout with 14 minutes on the bike. I'm a hot mess. 
What are you going to do for yourself today? 
It may hurt like hell while you're doing it, but I assure you you'll be proud of yourself when you're done! 

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Hanging on

So that darn wagon keeps hitting these bumps that pushes me ever so slightly to the edge and I have to hold on for dear life to not fall all the way off. That's how I've been feeling these last 10-14 days.

Yesterday was the first day in that time frame that I told my inner voice to shut up and let me do the walking. I hopped on the treadmill for a thirty minute walk last night. That's the first time I've done that in nearly three weeks!  Yikes!  I kick it in the gym and should be doing cardio on my "off days" but I just haven't had the vigor to do it. Well, I do now or at least I'm going to "fake it til I make it".

Yup. I had a long talk with myself yesterday about how 15 pounds or so isn't acceptable. Sure, it's a good amount of weight, but I should be near 25 at this point. I've been lax with my nutrition and clearly have been lax with the exercise. No more. I can't be putting this huge amount of money into personal training to just sit around and do nothing on the down days.

Nutrition has got to be tightened up too. Yesterday I logged everything. Haven't been doing that as much as I should have as of late. Yesterday's calories were just fine but the nutrition as a whole needs to be cleaned up. And I'm working on that. Honest to goodness, I am.

Some cool news though...I am seeing my bicep!  Really, I am! I can hardly believe there is actually a muscle forming under all that fat and jiggle. Sorry, but it's true. I'm not sugar coating it and I'm not trying to be down on myself, it's just the way that it is; I have "bye-bye" arms. Not for long though. The muscle is forming right before my eyes and it is so cool to see and realize how strong I really am!

I see a number of changes in my upper body.  My shirts are fitting loose, my core is getting strong and before I know it, I'll have some nice girl guns. I wish my lower body would follow suit but I'm sure it'll catch up soon....I hope.

So, it's not all bad. There is a lot to be proud of. There is a lot to celebrate. But, there is a lot to improve upon as well. It's time to focus and stay strong.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Monday, Monday

Had a great time at the game yesterday! I forgot how much I enjoy being at the game when your team is doing well or when the game is close as it was last night. Not sure if you watched the Pats vs. Jets game or even if you like football, but it was a CRAZY game!  And being there was even more crazy.  We were sitting at about the 10 yard line, 14 rows up. From the moment we sat down I knew it was going to be a wild ride. The people behind us were completely drunk and were obnoxious through the National Anthem - which totally ticked me off! And I couldn't believe that the stadium had birthday messages up on the jumbotron while the National Anthem was being performed. Bad for business, if you ask me. Anyway, the game gets going and the people behind us get their mouths going with the F-bombs left and right. Then they were saying "Yeah!  No kids around we can say F all we want!" that sort of thing.  Four of us from our row turned around and said "Yeah there is!" and we all pointed at the two boys sitting right in front of us.  They settled down after that. Thank goodness.

Anyway, the game was crazy fun and I'm so happy I was able to go. I also have to give a huge thank you to my brother!  The poor guy had to deal with my little one who apparently had stomach issues. My brother did a great job handling it and I am so thankful!

Alright, time to play along with Kenlie and FMM: Winning the Lottery

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here at: so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

Winning the Lottery
What’s the first thing you would do for yourself if you won 100 million dollars?  Note: this question is specifically for you…what would you do for fun after the family and the bills and the obvious stuff was taken care of?
Isn't this something we all dream about. I swear every time I buy I lotto ticket, I have the money spent before I even have the ticket in my hand. A girl can dream! 
I would buy a 1969 cherry red Ford Mustang convertible. It's my absolute dream car!  Been wanting one (and the General Lee) since I was a kid.
I would also put an addition on the house. The bedrooms in the house are too small. They get messy fast because there is no place to put anything. 
I would also go on a trip. I'm also thinking Atlantis because my girlfriend just came back from there with her family and the pictures are amazing!  I'd love to be able to take the kids!  
Now it's your turn, what would you do with a lotto win?

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Anniversary Weekend

Sending a shout out to Hubs this weekend...HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!  We've been married for 11 years as of yesterday. It's amazing how fast the time has gone by...I still remember our wedding like it was yesterday.

Eating this weekend has been just OK. Friday I probably could have done better at dinner and yesterday I should have had more protein in the morning because by mid afternoon I was ravenous. We ended up eating out which is never good for the wallet or the waistline. I opted for the terrible choices because I was so hungry.  I hate it when I don't plan ahead.

Today could go either way.  We're headed to Gillette Stadium for the Pats game. I haven't been to a game since the playoffs from the first time we went to the superbowl with the Giants. Needless to say I am pretty excited! The food choices there aren't the best...clearly. It's a football stadium for goodness sakes. It's full of nachos and beer!  Good thing I hate beer.

I am super excited to have a day off. No kids. I LOVE my kids more than anything in the world! I hug them and squeeze them a million times a day. I tell them a billion times a day how much I love them. But I need a break. I'm really looking forward to some much needed adult only time. The only thing I'm not looking forward to is the state of my house when we return tonight. My brother is "watching" the kids. Actually, my brother will be watching the football games with his friend while my niece and two boys run amok through the house. It's all good though. I get to go out. Sans kids.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Friday beating

I'm starting to love my Friday beatings. 

I swear the trainers are worse on Friday's than any other day during the week!  
Today I got to work out with Rudy. When I walked in and was all settled, he came over to get started. I looked at him and said "oh, are you ready for me?" He nodded. I then said "Well, I'm not so sure I'm ready for you!"  We both giggled and got on with it. 

Today was another "first" for me. Rudy thought it would be a good idea to try something similar to this: 

It wasn't as pretty as that though. I guarantee it. I hate getting into the plank position to begin with. I'm always afraid I'm going to collapse (never have, so I should get over it already). I didn't tap my shoulder though. I was supposed to tap my hands but I didn't really have the strength to get "that far" so Rudy held his hand right next to mine so I just had to hold my body up on one arm long enough to tap his hand. I (just barely) was able to complete 10 reps on each side. Oye!  That was rough, but I did it!

The scale was stable this week. No loss. No gain. I'd like to lose 5 pounds by November 1st. If I get back to walking on the treadmill on my "off" days and eating better, I think I can do it! Here goes nothing. 

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Feel the burn

I hate it when my sleep is interrupted, especially when it's because my chest is on fire with heartburn. Oh, I've been suffering with some major heartburn the last few days. I've even put myself back on some Prilosec. Ugh. I hate taking medications!  It's all my own fault though. All week I've been eating more processed foods than I have in a while. It's really starting to get to me. I was so uncomfortable last night that I hardly ate today out of fear of pain.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Better Day

Today was remarkably better than the last few days.

My spirits were lifted a bit after completing yet another awesome workout with Damon!
I was especially excited because I was able to do one of these:

The first time I tried one of those (day one of working with Damon), I went into complete panic mode. I ended up having to raise one leg at a time while the other stayed on the floor.  Today was another story. I'm sure it didn't look pretty, but I was able to complete the exercise as it was meant to be!  Go me! 

It's moments like that that make me realize how strong I am becoming and how far I've come. The scale may be moving at a snail's pace (this week is 150% my fault) but in the end the workouts are working. 

I also dug deep and decided that I can't be all down in the dumps like this for a week at a time on a monthly basis. I need to buck up and do what I can to snap out of it. And that is exactly what I did. I started by getting the chores done: they certainly aren't going to get done by themselves. Then I went on and organized a little section of my kitchen counter that was starting to look like a massive mountain of paperwork and junk. I still have some other organizing project to get done, but for the most part things are in order and I can stop stressing out about the small stuff. 

The small stuff. That's what seems to bother me the most during my PMS/PMDD days. It is so frustrating to feel this way. Imagine being totally stressed out because you have to sweep the floor (I know, the horror!). But that's exactly what life is like for me during these times; the smallest of tasks can feel like having to climb the highest of mountains. On days like today when I can tell that voice to shush, I feel so much better. It's days like today that I need to bear in mind when I'm having such a horrible day where even getting out of bed in the morning is too much.  Depressing? Yes. But it's the truth...once I'm back to day one of my cycle, I am back to being me.  I CAN'T wait for day one! 

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Where's that wagon gone now?

Ugh!  I need to get back on that lousy wagon! I'm really seeing a pattern here; I do well for 3 weeks out of the month and then really lose it (and my mind) for one. That is certainly me this week. I'm in the blah zone today.  My eldest was home sick from school both yesterday and today. Yesterday, I was motivated to at least get some housework done along with some organizing in my craft room. Today was a completely different story. I was mopey, hung around on the intertubes for most of the morning and snuck in a nap this afternoon.  My house is a disaster and I have nothing left in me to take care of it. I wish there was an anti-depressant that I could take during the week prior to TOM. I guess there is...exercise.

Oh, did I mention I haven't done any of that either!  Oh my! My last workout was on Friday. I didn't get to the gym yesterday because my son had a fever and a sore throat so we were at the DR's office. No Strep (yea!  We get to hold on to the "never had that in our house" medal). I was planning on getting up this morning to walk on the treadmill and then I was going to do the same tonight. Nope. I did nothing. I really should have stuffed my bad voice down into the depths of you-know-where and hopped on the treadmill, but I didn't. Frustrated with myself for that decision!

Tomorrow is Wednesday, gym day!  Can't wait!  The big kid's fever broke late this morning, so he'll be cleared for school tomorrow. My little man was hitting 99.8 this afternoon, but no fever as of bedtime, so God-willing, I'll be at the gym in the morning!  And I need it!

And the tone here isn't like the whiney crap of yester-month. It's more of an annoyance with myself for letting my mood dictate what I'm going to do. Tomorrow will be a new day and I will get on that wagon...

....I just hope the wagon didn't roll away with the Earthquake we had tonight. WHAT?  Earthquake!?  Surely not here in New England!  Yup, was a 4.6 in Maine and felt down through Connecticut. My kids were freaked out, but everyone is OK. It was something new for us in these parts. Nothing like a  little jolt to make you feel alive.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Just have it already

I've been craving an ice cream sundae. I've dodged the craving but have been eating everything else instead. I'm soon to see TOM (sorry for the TMI, but it's all part of the journey) and this is how I get. I learned once that I should just go ahead and have whatever-it-is that I'm longing for so I don't go looking for replacements.  That's ultimately what I've been doing the last 3 days and I know I'm going to pay for it. So, tonight I am having an ice cream sundae so I can get on with it.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Weekend Update

I have a love/hate relationship with busy days. I love when time just moves right along and yet I hate it when I'm so busy that I get consumed by outside things and plans don't fall into place like they are supposed to. This was me Friday.

I was up early (for me). Out the door by 7:30 to get to an appointment at the hospital in Boston for 10.  The trip in to the city took "only" 90 minutes, (with no traffic it takes me about 30 or a bit less depending on where in the city I'm headed). Anyway, I had an appointment to see the rheumatologist about the psoriasis and possibly having psoriatic arthritis. I love this doctor that I see. He is very thorough and listens to what you have to say. He never makes me feel like I'm crazy or just imagining the things I feel.

He's not all that sure what is going on with me. He said it's quite possible I have psoriatic arthritis and at this point, it would be very mild. He took X-rays of my hands to see what's going on there. He's also running the Lupus test again. Do you know how many times I've been tested for Lupus? More than I can count!  There was this one time where the one test came back positive, but it's been negative ever since. I go back in 8 weeks to follow up with how I'm feeling.

After my appointment, I headed off to the gym. I was exhausted when I walked in and exhilarated by the time I walked out. Bob (trainer for the day) noticed how tired I was but was relieved to see how quickly I woke up. He gave me one heck of a workout!

My one regret is that I didn't let the workout carry me through the weekend. I have to admit to not eating so great this weekend. Yesterday wasn't too bad but today was just awful!  I am in no way beating myself up about it because that isn't going to be productive. I'm going to admit to my 3 pieces of pizza (very abnormal for me) and then had Mexican for dinner (I overate for sure!). Like I said though, I am owning it and am moving on.

The plan for the week is to have my 3 training sessions (30 mins. each) and then I will do 8 minutes on the arc trainer (been working my way up to 10) along with 15 on the bike (again, working my way up). I will also commit to walking on the treadmill on both Tuesday and Thursday (off from the gym  those 2 days). All of that with some water and juicing.

Oh yea, juicing. I'll talk about that this week...should be a fun journey.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Sleep would be good here

I am tired. So very, very tired. After the cars were broken into last week, I found myself waking up a lot in the middle of the night. There was even a night where I woke up and stayed up for a few hours (wouldn't it have been nice if those hours were productive). Not only have I been waking up but so have the kids. A few nights ago, both of them climbed into bed with us (that is a rarity so when it happens, I let them stay). And last night, rather this morning, my little guy came in to get Daddy up at 5:30. He was up. He wanted Daddy up to play with him. We tried explaining to him that it was still dark out but he could go read in his room if he wanted. And so began the yelling (on his part).

My little guy isn't feeling too well. He hasn't been 100% since we both came down with that cold last what 6 weeks? Anyway, this is how life is with him. His ears and face fill up with so much fluid that he can't sleep and he can hardly function. He's "fine" for the first hours of the day but is quick to become Mr. Cranky Pants. The doctors tell us he'll out grow it, but they don't have to live it every day. He's a happy-go-lucky kind of kid. He'll make you laugh like you wouldn't believe. Just not when he's sick. And when he is sick, he's up and down for weeks (clearly, we are on week 6 or 7).

So that's my stressor right now. Trying to figure out how to make him comfortable so he (and the rest of us) can sleep and not be so cranky. I am thankful that it's "just sinus/ear" stuff with him. There are so many other kids and families out there who have really sick children, and to them I offer up my prayers. Even with that thought though, I still get frustrated that he has to be so miserable.

Being so tired doesn't bode well for getting exercise in. I did do a kick-ass workout yesterday though. I was so surprised when Damon had me try something a bit different and I was able to do it. He's had me do planks before. They aren't too bad, I just take a moment to figure out how I'm going to get up into position. Once I'm there, I'm good-to-go. My planks aren't on the floor though. Sure, my feet are on the floor but my elbows are up on a bench. Yesterday, he had me get up into plank position then I had to lift myself up like I was going to do a pushup. When he first showed me what he wanted me to do, I thought "I don't know if I can do that". I know I'm getting stronger but I honestly didn't think my arms could handle being up on them. I was wrong. I couldn't believe I did it and how "easy" it was!  It's those small victories that make this all worth it.

Today I won't really have much of a workout. I can't get to my treadmill with all the crap from the possible yard sale on Saturday. My plan for today is to focus on drinking water (I'm not good at that when it's not a gym day) and to stay within calories.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Keeping it together

Today is going to be a rough one.

Poor planning on my part. No one to blame but me. Going to make the best of it though.

I was exhausted yesterday. Hubs stayed home so we could do family stuff (kids were out of school with Columbus Day). I decided I would have liked to use half of yesterday as a break. Goodness knows I need one. Sad thing though was that I was too tired to do the thing I've been looking forward to - scrapbooking. I went into my room and tried to start a project. My eyes just wouldn't let me. So I just gathered some stuff to add to our yard sale pile and called it a day.

All wasn't completly lost though. Hubs and the kids went out for ice cream with my parents. Ice Cream is rough for me, it was amazing that I only had a taste when we went to Ben & Jerry's over the weekend!  I stayed home and caught up on Grey's and Private Practice (MAN! I love those shows!). That was the extent of my down time. I was happy to have some but would have loved to be able to craft.

The one thing we should have done yesterday was food shop. We are out of just about everything. Seriously. I had no oatmeal, yogurt or cereal left for breakfast this morning. I'm not sure what I have in there for lunch - possibly a piece of lettuce and some ham. My point though is that the cupboards are bare and I have no car today. I thought about that fact too late last night to really do anything about it. Should have gone food shopping this weekend while hubs was home. It's going to make eating right very difficult but I promise to do my best!

My plan for today is to go through the cupboards to figure out what I can make for the rest of the day. I also plan on being a little under my calories as I can't get on the treadmill this week: it's blocked with piles of yardsale/Craigslist stuff.

Once the kitchen stuff is straightened out, I need to get started on my son's Halloween Costume. He wants to be Jake from Jake and the Neverland Pirates. The costume is sold out everywhere and the few times I have found it, it's been too small for him! He's been so upset so I told him I would make him one. I found a good tutorial here.  I'm not going to make the T-shirt though. Thought I would just buy a cheap-o white shirt and alter it. I'll post pics once it's done.
I'd also like to get to making the homemade dish detergent that I mentioned yesterday. If I get to that, I will post the recipe I used as well as the one for the laundry detergent. They are both super easy and the best part is that they are non-toxic!

Monday, October 8, 2012

Weekend Wrap up and FMM

The weather was so unstable this weekend. I wish (for once) the weather guys would get it right!  We ended up going leaf peeping on Saturday because the weather reports had Saturday being the better day of the weekend. It was cloudy and rained in Vermont. The leaf peeping was still beautiful. 

We ended up stopping at Ben & Jerry's Factory. That was fun, but crazy busy!  We didn't do the tour because the wait was just too long for our little men (and for us). The kids and hubs had some ice cream (I had a bite, yes, JUST a bite!). We were able to wander around the property some as the rain ended up stopping just in time for us to be outside. 

Yesterday we spent the day cleaning out our basement. Too many toys and other junk all over the place. I started placing some of our stuff up on Craigslist and will be having a yard sale on Saturday. My living room looks like a disaster area with all the crap (I mean nice stuff) we need to unload. The funny part of the cleaning yesterday was that hubs commented to me how sore he was last night (Sure, he did lift big furniture); I wasn't sore at all. Must be the gym paying off a bit. 

And now for some fun with FMM:

Inside Your Home

1. Do you live in an apartment/condo, townhouse or house?  House

2. What is your home’s coolest feature? It's the house I grew up in. I love our yard! 

3.  Do you enjoy DIY projects?  If so, what are you working on now?  I loathe DIY projects. I'm a perfectionist so I see all the imperfections. Wish we could pay people to do all our projects. 

4. When using the dishwasher do you use powder detergent or liquid?  I've been using the packets. I'd like to give homemade detergent a try...I already make my own laundry detergent. 

5. Do you have a TV in your bedroom?  No way. It's bad enough we have the iphones and ipad. 

6.  Is your range gas or electric?  Gas. 

7.  How often do you sweep/mop/vacuum?  As needed.

8.  What is your favorite place to shop for home furniture and accents? First would be Target. Also have to give some love to IKEA. 

9.  Do you decorate for holidays?  Yes!!! I love holidays! 

10.  If you could have HGTV come in and redo one room in your home which room would you choose?  That's easy - the KITCHEN!  OMG!  Our kitchen is in near dire (and I only say "near" because I have (sadly) seen worse) need for a remodel! 

Now it's your turn! 

Friday, October 5, 2012

Big loss and lots of little stuff

Down 6 pounds this week for a grand total of 15.3 pounds lost in nearly 7 weeks.

I'm happy to finally be headed in the right direction! That gain a few weeks ago too a week to put on and two weeks to take off. Ugh. I hate my body sometimes, but like I've been saying, no giving up!

I shared earlier in the week that I'm starting to feel the changes. Only to the upper body though. My pants are still fitting exactly the same. I can't wait for things to start loosening up. Must be getting close to that happening.

I did a lot of baking yesterday. My girlfriend had some fresh veggies from her parent's garden that she (unfortunately) wasn't going to be able to use so she offered them to me. I was going to make some healthy stuff out of them but then felt bad that she wasn't going to use the veggies so I thought I would bake with them.  I made a zucchini bread, zucchini and carrot bread and a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting (OMG! So good). I did remarkably well with keeping the tastes to a minimum. I love to bake (HATE to cook though), but I don't bake often because I will eat it all. I did good yesterday though.  My only regret is not taking pictures of the veggies and the baked goods before sending them off.

This weekend is looking rather bleak weather wise. We probably won't get any hiking or much other outside activities in. I guess it's not the end of the world, there are tons of projects that need doing around the house (see that honey, we have stuff to do ;-)). My thoughts are to get a few things done around here and then get some crafty time in.

What are your weekend plans?
I must now go get a beating at the gym. Seriously, I'm working with Rudy today. He beats the crap out of me. I'm almost afraid.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

The Good. The Bad. The Ugly.

I went clothes shopping for myself last night. 
Not because my clothes are getting so big they are falling off. 
Not because I enjoy shopping for clothes. 
Not because I wanted something new. 
I had to. I needed an interview outfit. I tossed the nice clothes I had last summer when everything got to be 2 (or more) sizes to big for me. Big mistake. I should have held on to everything until I got a lot more weight off. Live and learn. 

I hate clothes shopping. When Fashion Bug by me (and now all of them) closed, I became even more discouraged about the thought of clothes shopping. Fashion Bug had fairly reasonable prices (although I noticed the prices were increasing to almost ridiculousness) and for the most part I could find things in my size. 

Lane Bryant is out of the question for me because they only sell up to a 28. I'm almost there, but not quite (but hang on to that thought) so the only other retailer around me that I can shop at is The Avenue.  The Avenue is supposed to carry up to size 32. According to their advertising anyway. I would beg to differ. Anytime I go there, I end up leaving in total and complete frustration and swear I will never be back. Why is that?  For starters the store is over stocked. There are too many racks and too much stuff on the racks. When my son was little, I couldn't even shop in there with an umbrella stroller because we'd get stuck between the racks. I feel bad for anyone who has to shop from a wheelchair!  On top of that, they keep the tags tucked into all the clothing, making it very difficult to find the size you are looking for. I always end up having to go through every single item only to find that      A. the item doesn't come in my size or        B. They are out of stock in my size. 

Last night I headed up to The Avenue in the hopes of finding a pair of dress pants. I walk into the store and a sales person is quick to greet me. I decided to just ask for help because I do, quite often, leave there angry. I explained to the girl that the store frustrates me because I can't find the sizing so would she please help me find something in a size 28/30. "I'm sorry ma'am, we have nothing in that size in pants"  WHAT?!?!  Nothing? Nada? Ziltch?  I fought the tears. She continued to say that they have been after the district manager to get more of "that" size in because it's always understocked. Crap. What am I to do now? I had an interview the next day and now I'm screwed. I walked out biting my lip with tears in my eyes. 

Here's where the self-loathing and the pity party started. I walked back to my car and cried; I mean really cried. For a minute. I gave myself the "you did this to yourself" kind of talk. Then I shook it off. That kind of feeling sorry for myself wasn't going to solve my problem. I had 2 choices; I could go try Lane Bryant in the mall which was in the next plaza OR drive (after calling first) over an hour to the next Avenue if they had anything in stock. I opted for option number one. I tried on two pairs of pants at Lane Bryant and they FIT!  I couldn't believe it.  Sure, it was a little tight, but I could make it work. I was beside myself! 

My hard work is starting to pay off. I'm going to keep on keeping on and hopefully in the not-so-distant future I won't hate clothes shopping so much. Until then, I will stick to shopping online.